IWYIM- Jerk Chicken with Willie and Coach Duggs

I was in the mood for jerk chicken last week, but since I didn't know of any Caribbean spots near me I made the fatal mistake of going to a chain.

The place was called Bahama Breeze and it was conveniently semi-attached to a large mall built around a Target.

I was with my bride and 2 of my 3 liabilities, and after a quick glance at the menu online, I thought it was a benign enough choice to satisfy 4 different palates.

I wasn't totally wrong... My son had a burger, that he enjoyed.  My daughter had a chicken sandwich that seemed okay.  My wife had a Caribean salad that was filled with both vegetables and fruits, and she did not complain.  And I ordered the jerk chicken which came out looking like this...

Which isn't to say it looked bad, it just didn't look like any jerk chicken I had eaten before.  But my expectations weren't high going into the meal, so I was not overly disappointed.

As a matter of fact, I ate most of it… Sorta tasted like salty BBQ wings… So no-harm/no-foul on their lack of authenticity.

The highlight of the meal was actually the anchored iPad on our table on which we could order drinks AND play trivia versus other people in the restaurant.  

And play trivia I did.

There's a chance the computer-generated "Stephanie" I fucking OWNED in multiple games doesn't exist, but in the off-chance Steph was a real person sitting just a couple of tables away, know that bitch got absolutely FED that night with mediocre mall food PLUS my knowledge of 80s and 90s movies.

I casually mentioned my meal the next day to my good friend Willie Colon, and he was utterly disgusted… So much so, he offered to take me to a spot he likes in the Lower East Side of NYC for some authentic jerk, so I said, "Bet."

But before we hit the jerk spot (which sounds like a great name for a massage parlor), Willie and I took the lovable Coach Duggs to McSorley's.  

Duggs was on our show a handful of times, and we had promised to give him a couple of nickel tours once he moved up to the big city.  So what better intro to the LES of Manhattan than a quick 40 beers and some liverwurst at McSorley's followed up with some jerk chicken?

The McSorley's part of the evening was well documented by our producer, John Kelly, who is going to edit out as many double-chins as he can and then release the tape in the next week or so.  But before that happens, just know that McSorley's is still a must-go-to destination in NYC.

The place is dripping with history, and we were lucky enough to have the manager give us an inside look at some of the more interesting facets of this institution.

I will say this- I have been going to McSorley's since I was 15 years old, and I never knew until last week that their hot English mustard was made fresh every morning.  They simply mix ground mustard powder with their light ale and let it sit for an hour or so… No vinegar or added spices… Just mustard seed and beer… And it is fantastic with a saltine, a slice of cheese, and a hunk of Boar's Head Strassburger liverwurst.

The three of us polished off 20 lights and 20 darks (between us, not apiece), and after we left McSorley's, Willie, Coach Duggs, and I headed even further downtown to Stanton Street to Peppa's for some jerk chicken.

Peppa's is by no means a "chain" but it does have 3 locations in Brooklyn and this new one in Lower Manhattan.

After reading multiple reviews of all of their locations, it seems that although the menu changes slightly depending on which Peppa's you try, the jerk chicken is the same across the board.

And by "the same", I mean "fucking delicious".

As is so often the case, I ordered arguably too much… 

But when the food came out, the three of us attacked it like we had 9 assholes (between us, not apiece).

Even though this newest outpost of Peppa's had a more polished feel, the smoky heat from their jerk was as good on Stanton Street as it would be Port-au-Prince.

Unlike that shellacked wing I had earlier in the week, this is how jerk chicken is supposed to look…

Hacked-off pieces of yard-bird crusted in either a rub or marinade that screams allspice and has your asshole screaming "No mas!" only a few hours later from that unmistakable Scotch Bonnet sweet-heat.

We had jerk pork and jerk oxtail as well, alongside some coco bread and a grapefruit soda (that 'I heard' goes GREAT with vodka… WINK!) called Ting.

Willie was satisfied, I was blown away, and even Coach Duggs' sensitive palate ultimately gave the place the thumbs up.

The prices were very reasonable, but ultimately the meal cost me somewhere in the neighborhood of $10,000 because Willie and I were filming both here and at McSorley's (one of the only bars in the world without a TV) while my Barstool Bracket Blocker team was pulling off a very tweetable upset… And I could've easily tweeted about it multiple times if I wasn't so busy stuffing my fat fucking face with liverwurst and oxtails.

A bright spot is that my pick was given to Smokes and Hubbs who promised to buy me lunch at some point this Spring.

Live and learn, I guess, and a belated "Go Beaves!"

(Also, the good people at Blockfolio have everything you ((or Tommy, or Hubbs, but not I)) need to start your crypto portfolio.)

And if you're ever in downtown Brooklyn or the Lower East Side and you're looking to scratch that Island itch, I highly recommend Peppa's as something that you should jerk inside of you.

You know what I mean… Enjoy!

IWYIM

-Large

As is the case every week, Grubhouse starts later-on today at 2 PM… Myself, Clem, and Coach Duggs will be chatting about everything you need to know about what life is like after you've given up physically.

For example: Would you?… 

Usually, we record Grubhouse on the Clubhouse platform, but this week we are going to fuck with Twitter's answer to Clubhouse… A platform called "Spaces".

So if you follow Clem, Duggs, or me you no longer need to have a Clubhouse invite to listen to Grubhouse.  You just have to click on one of our Fleet avatars at the top of your Twitter feed once they start to glow purple to listen in and/or possibly join in the conversation.

And finally, here is your weekly…

FOOD CALENDAR

Today, Friday, March 26th- National Spinach Day

Saturday, Mar 27th- International Whiskey Day

Sunday, Mar 28th- National Something On A Stick Day

Monday, Mar 29th-  National Lemon Chiffon Cake Day

Tuesday, Mar 30th- National Turkey Neck Soup Day

Wednesday, Mar 31st- National Tater Tots Day and National Clams On The Half Shell Day

Thursday, April 1st (April Fools)-  National Burrito Day (first Thursday in April)

Friday, April 2nd (Good Friday)- National PB&J Day

Act accordingly.

-L